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The Myatheira Chronicles: Volume Three: Crown of Ice Page 16
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Keeping her posture erect she stared into the distance. Now that she had time to think over the events, she realized just how out of line she’d been. She had grabbed the Prince. In her defense she didn’t know who he was at the time, though it made little difference. The crown he wore should have been her first clue of his status. It was hard to believe he even let her touch him. She couldn’t imagine what she would have done in his position. To have someone fondle her face in that manner. What was she thinking? Her father would be furious if he knew.
“It is not like you to look distant, Neomi. Tell me what you think of.”
She didn’t want to look at Moinie. It was imperative she remain calm. No one could know her unease. They weren’t in the clear yet. After the way she behaved, it remained possible for the Prince to argue his parents against providing the aid she requested. The polite thing for her to do would have been to let him near her when he approached. Shouting at him that she was in no need of his help was a poor choice in phrasing. “I think of my father and his men back home. We know so little of this creature we face. I cannot help feeling a pit in my stomach at the thought of returning to Ethrysta to find them all dead.”
“Your father will be fine,” Moinie stated calmly, the tone of her voice revealing no sign of false assurances. She honestly believed her words to be the truth. “We should be more worried about ourselves at the moment. It would have been safer if the Vor’shai had offered us to rest in the city. I find it insulting they did not.”
“They did. I refused the Prince’s offer.”
“Refused? Why would you do that? What if they consider it an insult?”
Neomi pursed her lips. She shared the same concern but there was nothing to be done about it. They were already a full day away from the palace. To turn back now would waste precious time they could use in getting home. “If you must know, I did not trust the Prince,” she lied. It sounded better than admitting she’d panicked when faced with the thought of staying in an unfamiliar place. “He has strange manners. I do not like the way he looks at me.”
“He is from a different society. I am sure he found your manners strange as well.” Moinie lifted her head, eyeing Neomi with a look of fascination. “We all saw you slap him. We expected him to turn you away. I am still in awe that you succeeded in acquiring their assistance after such a display.”
“He grabbed me –”
“You did the same to him. Neomi,” she started, shaking her head slowly. “This is my fault. I should have warned you of the customs Onuric spoke of regarding these people. I doubted it would be necessary, but I see now it was unwise of me not to enlighten you.”
Wrinkling her nose Neomi gazed down at her hand. The Prince had taken it. He tried to kiss it. She shuddered at the thought. Why would anyone consider it polite to do something of that nature? Physical contact was inappropriate. She let her fingers slide along her coat to clutch at the ring which hung from her neck. The chain supporting it was sturdy. Thick. It was the only thing she had left of her husband. He was the only man who had any right to put his lips anywhere near her. For the Prince to be so bold… it left a sense of uneasiness in her mind. “He had no right to perform a gesture with an implication of intimacy by use of his lips. Mevuk never behaved in that manner. Why should I allow a complete stranger to do so?”
“Because it was the polite thing to do. Onuric spoke of their strange hand custom after his first journey to the south,” Moinie smirked at the memory. “I believe it may have been the very Prince you met who taught him and your father the custom. My husband despises him. When we return, it might be best if you not mention the Prince in his company.”
“Why would Onuric dislike him? Did they have a disagreement?”
“Who knows?” Moinie shrugged. “You know your brother. He doesn’t require a reason to dislike someone. It is possible he resented having a stranger teach him. Onuric prefers to think he already knows everything there is to know. He likely took offense to what was probably a simple gesture of kindness. The same as you did.”
This conversation was doing nothing to ease her embarrassment. She didn’t want to accept the idea that she was in the wrong. It was better to think the Prince was out of line in order to justify her harsh treatment toward him. “I don’t understand,” she replied quietly, giving in to the urge to look at her friend’s face. There was no reason to conceal her feelings from Moinie. She wouldn’t dare repeat them to anyone. “How can you tell me that I should have let him touch me when you stepped in to stop him as well? You contradict yourself.”
“The kiss on the hand was harmless,” Moinie waved dismissively. “When I stepped in, it was because I disapproved of him thinking he had any right to touch you in the way he seemed to intend. What was he trying to do?”
“I do not know. He asked me to come back inside. I feared he might try to force me into compliance.”
“Yes, he did appear to have taken an interest in you.”
“An interest?” Neomi almost laughed. “What kind of interest?”
“It is hard to say. I don’t know the way their men think, but I have to assume they view women different in these parts. There was something in his eyes that I didn’t like. Let us hope he does not accompany their soldiers when they travel to Ethrysta. Although,” she gave a sly wink from across the fire, “he was not hard to look upon.”
The comment pulled Neomi harshly from her thoughts, blinking at her friend in amazement. “Moinie,” she gasped in disbelief. “You are a married woman. How can you say such a thing?”
Moinie arched her brow, curious by Neomi’s reaction. “Even a married woman can appreciate when a man possesses admirable qualities in his physical form.”
“Who are we to know what are considered admirable qualities in a man of the Vor’shai?”
“I should think it obvious,” Moinie gave a half-grin, stoking the fire with a long stick, sparks shooting up from under the flames. “His frame was solid. He carried himself with dignity. I am not sure what to think of a man with hair of the dark shade he wears, but his eyes were fascinating. We are accustomed to the men of our people. There is nothing wrong with enjoying a change of scenery. As long he keeps his hands to himself.”
She pondered what Moinie said, confused by her words. Thinking back, she recalled having similar thoughts about the Prince while in his company. The unusual term of handsome had even crossed her mind at one point. But what exactly made a man handsome? She knew the word, though she had no experience which allowed her to truly understand its meaning. It was probably for the best. He was Vor’shai. She was Ovatai. Even looking at him for mere entertainment seemed a waste of time. Their kind would never mix. Their cultures were too different. Not to mention the fact that her father would fiercely disapprove. She might have been compelled to like him if she hadn’t found him so utterly offensive. “I see now why my brother dislikes him,” she nodded.
“And why is that?”
“He must have taken one look at him and realized that you would be intrigued by his appearance. Perhaps Onuric is jealous.” Smiling felt awkward at a time like this. The corners of her lips twitched upward, the expression failing to fully mature upon her face before she relaxed to her usual, stern countenance. Moinie would know she spoke in jest. It didn’t require her to make it any more obvious. “The Prince aside, I must admit that I still have my doubts about the Vor’shai’s agreement to help us. I like to think they would not break their promise, but we have experienced a great deal of betrayal as of late. I realize nothing is impossible.”
“Why did we not stay then?” Moinie asked. “We could have remained in Tanispa to help lead their soldiers to Nahedu. It is possible they will find themselves lost along the way and never reach us without our guidance.”
“My father needs us in Ethrysta. We will be of more worth to him at home than we are sitting here in the south. If the Vor’shai soldiers cannot find their way by use of the simple map I left them, then they are of no use to us.
”
“On this map – where did you direct them to go? It will do little good if they are unfamiliar with the land.”
“I made it foolproof, Moinie,” Neomi nodded. Of everything she’d done while in discussions with the Vor’shai Captain, the map was her proudest idea. The Captain seemed intelligent enough and he made no attempts to argue his lack of familiarity with their country. She admired that quality in him. No nonsense. He held no foolish desire to sound more experienced simply to impress her. “I gave only directions to the first watch point near the Hauthus lands in the southern regions. On our way to Nahedu, we will stop and speak with the men stationed there. They will be able to tell us where new watch points have been set up and we can leave directions for the Vor’shai troops along the way. Their Captain promises me they will be no more than two days behind us in our journey.”
“And if they are late?”
“Then we know they have changed their mind about helping us. Now, we should get some sleep. We have a long walk ahead of us,” she replied calmly, no longer able to fight off the exhaustion coming over her. She could barely keep her eyes open from the weight of her lashes. If they wanted to be on the road before the sun came up, she needed to have at least a few hours of sleep to refresh her for the long journey. There was no way of knowing what they would return to find back home.
Waiting was torture. It had been hours since Edric left the General’s chambers, pacing the floors in his room, anxious for word of his parents’ decision. How hard was it to say yes or no? It was a simple matter. Either way, the troops would make it north. The only difference was in who would lead them.
A knock at the door nearly sent him into a panic. He wasn’t sure what he would do or say if the General came to tell him no. And what if he said yes? Edric wasn’t sure he was ready for that either. He’d resigned himself to the idea of going regardless of the fears it brought upon him, at the possibility of failure, but he didn’t know how to react in front of Cadell about it. If the General observed hesitance, he might be inclined to change his mind.
In a flurry of motion Edric hurried toward the door, bumping his knee painfully against a corner on the coffee table in his path. Uttering a mumbled curse he limped the rest of the way, swinging the door open with an exasperated breath. To his surprise it wasn’t the General he found standing on the other side. Instead it was a rundown looking Callum, his pallor worsened since Edric had seen him earlier that morning. The clothing he wore remained unchanged. Wrinkled. Edric couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen his friend look so awful.
“Callum,” he breathed, wincing from the uncomfortable tingle that lingered in his knee. Opening the door further he motioned his friend to come in, peering out into the hallway to see if anyone else was coming. “I thought you would be asleep by now. You look exhausted.”
“I can’t sleep,” Callum frowned. “I wish I could. This night – morning – has been miserable.”
“How is Aiva? Is she alright?”
“She finally cried herself to sleep. I don’t know what to do, Edric,” Callum moved further into the room, swaying slightly, unsteady on his feet. Edric moved to his side, afraid he might fall. Callum paused to regain his balance, rubbing at his eyes tiredly. “I never thought I would fail her like this. It’s killing me.”
Distracted from his own thoughts Edric helped Callum to a chair near the fireplace, watching him carefully. He was worried about his friend. It wasn’t like him to be this way. Callum always bore his troubles well. For them to have taken control of him like this, it had to be worse than he let on before. “This isn’t the first time you’ve had to go away,” he replied slowly, unsure of how to respond without risk of sounding heartless. He was far from that. The only thing that continued to nag at him was the fact that Cadell claimed Callum to have chosen to leave. If it wasn’t a direct order, he didn’t understand why Callum didn’t just say no. “Does she not understand that this is your profession? Leaving is part of the job.”
“Oh, she understands,” Callum nodded. “The problem is that I made a promise to her years ago that I’ve been unable to keep. And every time I go away, I break it again.”
“What kind of promise did you make?”
“That I would never leave her again.”
Edric peered at him, confused by the statement. “Why would you make that promise when you knew you couldn’t keep it?”
“Because I thought I could,” he sighed. “The first time I ever went away, I was gone for fifteen years between training and deployment to the ships in the Nahpoa Sea to fight the pirates. That time apart nearly destroyed the friendship I had with your sister. When we first expressed our feelings for one another, she admitted her fear in letting herself love me at the chance that I would go away again. At the time I didn’t think about it. All I knew was that I loved her more than anything and I was convinced I could find a way to never have to leave her alone. So I assured her I never would. Ever since then it feels as though leaving her is all I have ever done.”
“But you have never gone away for such an extended period of time. A few weeks here and there is nothing to fifteen years.”
“The weeks add up, Edric. It feels like fifteen years when the time we’ve had together does not compare to the time we spend apart. I’m afraid that if I did the math, my time away from her might be more than fifteen years by now.”
Edric scratched at his head quietly. Callum didn’t sound like a man who had made the decision to leave of his own free will. He sounded more like a man who was being sent to his execution. “Your father told me you volunteered for this task. Why would you do that?”
“My father?” Callum laughed miserably. “I wish my father would just retire already. If I had known the additional obligations I was taking on in accepting the position of Captain under him, I never would have taken it. It’s possibly the biggest regret I have in life to this point. Without that damnable title, I wouldn’t torture my wife the way I do.”
“Then you didn’t accept the task willingly?”
“I accepted it, but I would never use the word willingly. I had to deal with the guilt placed upon me by both my parents. My poor mother practically begged me to go in my father’s stead.”
“Did they not think of your wife? My sister suffers the same as your mother and I’m beginning to think no one has taken her feelings into consideration. When did everyone in this family become so damned selfish?” Edric gritted his teeth, resuming his pace across the room. His strides were longer than before. It wasn’t just worry which affected him now. He was angry. For the first time he found himself truly furious. The emotion was unfamiliar. Everything was just getting out of control. “How could your mother ask that of you? You are her son! Does she not care if you get killed? Does she not care that your wife is lying in bed, sick? Carrying your child!” His fists clenched involuntarily. “I have a mind to say a few words to your mother if that’s the case.”
“It’s not like that, Edric,” Callum argued, rising from the chair to face him. “My mother is worried about my well-being. But you have to realize the number of times she has been forced to see my father off to war, never knowing if he would return. She has suffered that since before they were married.”
“He is a soldier! What did she expect?”
“She expected to suffer. Which is why she refused his first request for marriage,” Callum shook his head. “My father was willing to go north. He asked me if I would be willing to take the first wave and investigate the situation before we decided if it was necessary for us both to go. The request may not have been a direct order, but the look in his eyes told me that it was possible he might command it if I hesitated. And with my mother so shaken about the thought of him going away… how could I tell them no? I have an obligation to my family the same as I do my wife and the military. It is my duty to go when the troops are called and the happiness of my family was placed in my hands on top of it. I am being torn in three different directions and I�
��m not sure how much more I can take.”
Callum’s features contorted into a look of despair. Covering his face with his hands he sank into the chair, barely managing to choke back the tears which had been visible in the corners of his eyes. Edric’s rage dissipated, quickly rushing to Callum’s side to try and comfort him. He’d never seen his friend weep before. He wasn’t sure it was something he ever wanted to witness. “Callum, I know this is difficult for your parents, but your father never left your mother behind while she was with child. It would be more harmful for you to leave Aiva now than it would be for your father to endure one last battle before he steps down.” Exhaling a long breath he tried to gather his thoughts. Now was as good a time as any to tell Callum of his intentions. Regardless of the answer he might receive from the General once the discussion was completed, to know that Edric was trying to help might provide Callum a brief sliver of hope. “I put in a request to take your place if he did not wish to go. He is with my parents as we speak, discussing the matter.”
Slowly he watched Callum’s hands slide away from his face. The umber glow of his eyes flashed from some unknown emotion, peering steadily into Edric’s gaze. “You did what?” he whispered. “Edric, why would you do that?”
“Why?” he exclaimed. “Why wouldn’t I? You are my friend, Callum. I’m not going to sit and watch you and my sister suffer when I have a chance to prevent it.”
“But you have no military training. If you were to take my place and be killed in this battle, I would never forgive myself and I don’t think Aiva would forgive me either. This isn’t going to be like our fight against the pirates, Edric. A threat to the Ovatai is likely far more dangerous than a few raiders.”
“And I will never know what I am capable of if no one ever lets me try.”
Callum wiped at his eyes, laughing quietly to himself. “Now you sound like Aiva.”
“I think I’m finally understanding the way she felt back then,” Edric sighed, the last of his anger leaving him. It was impossible to hold onto the feeling when standing there with Callum. He was the most selfless person Edric had ever known. Edric could only hope to be like him one day. The decision he made now was a good start. “My family has no use for me here, Callum. I need to find my place. If in the process of doing so I am able to help you and my sister, then I’m willing to accept whatever risk comes with that.”